A place and a real purpose

It's weird. But I need a place that I can sort of get cozy and call "my space." Right now, it is in the corner of the room. I can see out the window in front of me and my eye catches pieces of nature or neighbors going by. I'm encouraged by all this. It is peaceful.

When I sit and study, I like to tune into some station that plays guitar hymns. I use a streaming media site like grooveshark, pandora or spotify. The hymns take me back to sweet time of learning about God. It's a wonderful thing to have faith like a child.

In this space, I can actually tune out the other distractions. Or at least, I can shift gears in and out of my space such that I don't feel a significant loss if I am distracted.

But what am I trying to do here? Well, honestly, reflect and pray.

It's interesting because I am convicted that when we reflect on anything (job performance, artist skills, sport, or relationships) we do so to improve on it for next time. If my code review was horrific, I'll take learning points and grow. If I stumble on the fourth stanza, I'll practice it more. If my shots always drift left, I'll try to straighten it out with practice. If I hurt someone unintentionally, I'll be more cautious in the future.

In all cases, I reflect and grow or develop that skill.

We fail to grow spiritually because we only ask God for the same things day after day. Bless this food, help us to have fun, keep us safe. Next day? Bless this food, help us to have fun, keep us safe.

How about really opening up to God. Yes, heal this person. Tell God how frustrated you are that the person is even sick to begin with. Ask him to reveal what you are supposed to learn from this so that next time you'll be able to handle it better.

What about your job? What co-worker do you want to shove in front of a train? Can you ask God to change your heart and attitude toward that person so you can see the world through their eyes? How would that grow you?

What about sport? Do you want to do well in your sport to show how good you are or to use it as a platform to reveal who God is? Can you pray that God would help you evaluate your motivations?

Who do you need to be thankful for? Who has been building you up and making you stronger? Who has helped you discover your faults and given you insight in how to improve? Can you give thanks to God for these people in your life (past and present)?

So my challenge is to find a place that you can call your own. Then pray with purpose - to improve yourself by getting to know the one who has plans for your life. My guess is when you sit down to eat, your prayer will change from "bless this food." to "Thanks for keeping me in good spirits all day and growing me, and thanks for food, that I might take time to acknowledge you were with me in those tough moments today."


Philippians 4:4-7
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Good Habits

Today I am going to try my first P90X work out. I hope I don't die.

In reality, I still have several physical goals out there. I would like to run a marathon. I would like to do a mini triathlon. I would also like to be able to play 90 minutes of soccer again. Here is how I started working towards those goals over the last two years... I ... um... coached soccer for six hours a week.

That doesn't sound like someone who is disciplined and focused on reaching a marathon goal does it? So in the last month, I've put more miles on my shoes than I have in the last two years combined. I'm pressing into it and trying to figure out how to organize my day so I can achieve my goal.

It seems to me that many people try to reach their goals like I did. I want to get in better shape, but I don't make time for it. I wonder how many of us apply this to our spiritual life. If I want to get better at spending time with God, I can't just sit around and hope it happens. It will be too much like my fitness achievements in the last couple years.

In the last month, I've been getting more on track with spending time doing just this, reading about God, reading his word, writing about what I learned and think. It takes time, but it fleshes out my theology (thoughts on God).

See, I am in pure bewilderment over the people out there that say the Bible is just a fairy tale. If you've read my blog for long, you know I'm still wrestling with the text myself. But you can't ignore it. Particularly the New Testament. From a historical document perspective, it is more verifiable than the existence of Shakespeare. And then you take the fact that it was Rome that persecuted the early church, literally lighting their highways with burning Christians (and criminals) - and somehow, Rome becomes the center of Christian influence the world round.

Yeah, you can't ignore it. Something happened there and I find it worth the study. It is just like wanting to get better about my fitness, I want to be savvy about my theology. More than that, since I believe in Jesus Christ, I want to respond to Him. And I can't do that very well if I don't give Him any time in my day.

So, is learning theology a good Habit? I think so.

Tomorrow I'll start more about this and my thoughts on making time for prayer, just one of those habits we should be better about.

Questioning His power

I have a problem in my prayer life. I often feel like I have to say a lot of "Thank You's." We were recently taking care of a couple extra kids for a couple weeks. After dinner prayers, the youngest would report the number of times someone said "and" in the prayer. So - typically, it was "thank you for .... and thank you for ... and thank you for ... "

My prayer life is largely hidden from my children. As a result, all they see is God is some massive provider that dumps blessing after blessing. This isn't horrible, but where is the God that I pray to that is taking care of the mess in my life and the pain around me? That's also very real to me, but not my kids.

I think that they suffer (as many of us do) from a lack of belief in Him giving a rip about us. If I pray asking for something, will he really listen? Will he act on my behalf?

Classic example for me is praying for my friends who are on death's doorstep. I pray for people who have a cold and I pray for cancer patients. The people who have a cold have been known to get better 100% of the time, but I've had a 0% success rate with cancer patients.

This makes me mad at God. I have to be honest. I'm filled with a lot of doubt about my faith. I hurt.

Perhaps you are like me in that sense. The only thing that keeps me going is knowing that He is still working in today's world. It's rarely me that hears a direct answer to prayer, but many of my close friends have. From watching muscle grow back on a lame man's leg to hearing a quiet voice direct someone to a specific passage of scripture. I had a friend that showed me a picture of Jesus floating beside their plane in a cloud. Seriously, a film photograph! My own great grandmother died and came back and shared her death experience with us.

My faith is largely based on the teachings of Christ being true, but then on the personal experiences that I have had and that those near me have had. So whether or not God chooses to answer my prayer, I still pray. I'm compelled to pray because I believe Ephesians 3 that he can do even more than I can imagine. And perhaps one day, my friend will be healed of Cancer.

A Prayer for the Ephesians
Ephesians 3:14-21
For this reason I kneel before the Father,  from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

Persistence in prayer

There is a parable about an old bag lady that can't get justice. Her only option is to work with a judge who is known for being more ruthless than compassionate. In the end, she wins her case simply by being persistent. In the story, we are told that if a ruthless person can deliver good results, how much more would someone who cares deeply about you.

The point of the story from the book of Luke is to get us to understand that God hears us and would like to give us the desires of our hearts. Well, if that was the case, I would argue that he seems rather inconsistent in those gifts.

Let me say what I do believe before coming back and addressing that. The Bible teaches that when we put our faith in Him, we become children of God (Ephesians 5, 1 John 3). We literally become his heir, an heir with Christ (Galations 4:7). 

So putting this in my own perspective, I'm a dad. I have more kids than most. I would like nothing more than to give them everything they ask for. But then, I discover when I do this, they seem to ask for more. Like the thing I gave them didn't satisfy them or something. Or they say "this isn't what I really wanted." Nuts! 

All the while, I discover that their wants/desires are taking away from the things I know they need, like education, fitness, or nutrition. It might also take away from a special event. For instance, I would love to take them to Disney - but we spent too much money on video games, youth camps, skiing, music lessons, sporting activities. 

In other words, it is difficult for me to know when a gift is going to be a long term win for my kids. Should I hold off for a greater good? 

On the flip side, I don't think God has that problem. He knows the result and He is going to work things out for the good of those that love him (Romans 8:28). The real question is timing. And if we think of our time on this earth like a vapor that rises on the sea and then vanishes, then the long term gift is what we should really be setting our sites on. 

Just the same, like the persistent widow, I will ask for things day after day in hopes that I might receive that blessing from God. And if I don't get what I want, I've come to discover that I often get what I need.

Luke 18:1-8, The Parable of the Persistent Widow

Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up. He said: “In a certain town there was a judge who neither feared God nor cared what people thought. And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, ‘Grant me justice against my adversary.’

“For some time he refused. But finally he said to himself, ‘Even though I don’t fear God or care what people think, yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice, so that she won’t eventually come and attack me!’”

And the Lord said, “Listen to what the unjust judge says. And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly. However, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on the earth?”

Speaking of Prayer

So, I've been compelled to get my own personal prayer life back on track. This is something that was going quite strong toward the beginning of the school year, but all of a sudden I was derailed. It was quite personal.

See, I am convinced that there is a God. But I had one of those "you don't care about me, God!" moments. So I basically stuck my middle finger up at him and dropped all communication. Since then, things haven't been all that great.

As a soccer coach, I sometimes have to make decisions to put a player in their "natural" position rather the position they want to play. That's my choice. I don't know what God is/was doing with me, but apparently my "natural" position is something other than what I think it should be. So I'm learning to cope with a coach that has a bigger perspective than my little life can see.

So I've revived my prayer life, but it isn't as real as it was. It feels more like a list of wants than a conversation with someone who wants to bring out the best in me. I'm still pressing into the issues with my perceived gifts and my ability to execute on those gifts.

This leaves me stuck in an odd place. I trust God. I doubt myself. I have a strange peace about my future (although those that are close to me are putting in plenty of worry for me), because I've taken this verse to heart.

Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

A little Alan Jackson here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QCV5t8wRBI8

So I'll be working on this. If you follow, you'll hear my journey.

Pray for others (and me)

Ephesians 6:18ff 
This is essentially the end of Paul's letter to the Ephesians. His encouragement to them is to remember to pray and remember him in their prayers.

Many people think that praying at meal time is weird. I have to agree, but here is my perspective. When Jesus was at the last supper, he took bread, broke it, gave thanks and shared it with his disciples. He did the same thing with the wine. Then he said, whenever you eat and drink in this way, remember me. While the elements are used to symbolize his body and blood, the command to remember has forever been set in my heart.

So as I approach a meal, you may or may not see me pray, but typically before every meal, my mind will remember Jesus and the sacrifice he made on the cross. That makes it easy for me to be grateful for the tremendous blessings I have in my life. So in that moment of hunger, I remember the blessings of my life and who gives them to me.

Second, Paul is asking for prayer. I find that the scriptures are not filled with 100's of Gospel Warriors (if you will) it has a handful of Heroes. Paul being one of them. I'm not a hero of the faith. I'm a guy just pressing into what I find in the Bible and really, all of life. But I do find when I serve in the Church, I get worn down. When I am weak, I'm vulnerable. And that's when I typically screw up.

So I totally get Paul asking for prayers. I also totally get him encouraging everybody to remember all the Lord's people. We all get worn down from work, parenting, lack of sleep, heartaches, relationships, etc... We need to depend on Him to become our strength when we are feeling weak.

Ephesians 6:18ff And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should.

The Word and me

Ephesians 6:14-17 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

Truth, righteousness, readiness, faith, salvation, and the word of God.

Word of God. This is the "sword of the Spirit" SWord. Who came up with that spelling. Do the Brits still put a "w" in it when they say it? How do you explain that one in spelling class? Sorry. I've never been good at spelling, not since Hue was pronounced "Way" which just happens to be the beginning of the place where I was born - so I've never taken spelling rules seriously.

Of - uv - don't ever forget that one. Simplest of all words. Two letters. Uv.

Like many times in the last week, the real question comes back to the Word of God. What is so special about this book, this sWord of the Spirit? This strikes to the core of us, if the Bible is true, then there is something we should glean from it, mainly, the relationship with God himself. I've always loved this quote:


“If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world.”
― C.S. Lewis

If every person honestly tries to answer the question about the desire for something more, they have to give the Bible some careful consideration. The Bible is amazing in that it conveys one message by a projected 40 authors over at least 1500 years. The teaching in it is consistent. From a historical perspective, experts say it can be trusted (is more reliable/has held up to more scrutiny/has undergone more scrutiny) than any other ancient record we have. What we really wrestle with is whether or not our human minds think it is "fair."

Enter human suffering. Enter unanswered prayers. Enter lust. I mean, why did God put Job through so much suffering just to win a pissing match with Satan, right? God, this isn't fair! Take these things away and just give me a happy place to live.

Well, that's what the book is all about! The object of the Book is to introduce the reader to the God who creates and recreates for His glory and our good. The Bible teaches us a better place than this is out there, and it is a place where the lion and lamb can lie peacefully beside each other.

I struggle with God and his expectations. You have to know this. I kick against him all the time. I don't like the "rules" of this world because I am selfish and want instant gratification. I am inheriently lazy. I'm a pleasure seeker. And the sooner the rest of you all would realize my needs and serve me, I would be much happier. Yeah... Oh wait... I see it. This world isn't fair because of people like me.

All I can say is that I'm glad God invested in those 40 people to give us His message that I might get a shot at knowing Him, and a potentially glorious future. That he can remake me? OK - I'll start to live like I believe he wants me to live in response to Him sending his Spirit, his Word into my life.

No other name

Ephesians 6:14-17 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

Truth, righteousness, readiness, faith, salvation, and the word of God.

Salvation. This is a difficult concept for a atheist. Saved from what? When you kick back and say "there is nothing beyond this little blue ball" then you really don't care for what is next. Personally, I think that these type of people are telling themselves one of two things.

"This world is great. People are inherently good/trying to do the right thing. When I die, I'll just turn back into dirt. Just like all the bugs I squash while walking down the street. Nobody knows they exist, nobody will know if they are gone. Same goes for me."
- or -
"This world is horrible. No matter what is next, it can't be much worse."

To this I run to Pascal's wager. Simply put, if you bet on God and are wrong, there is no loss. If you bet on God and are right, huge win for eternity. If you bet against God and are wrong, huge loss for eternity.

I don't intend to simplify the Gospel to a simple wager, but I do continue to point back to scripture that says if you seek Him you will find Him. It says salvation can be found in no other name.

My take here is to put God to the test. The Bible (if treated like a historical document) is more reliable than all other texts out there. The Bible (if treated like God breathed words) has the power to change your life.

And while I'm questioning whether or not you have to "invite Jesus into your heart," in order to be saved, I'm not questioning who Christ is and what God did through the cross. I simply rely on the Romans 10:9 verse that says if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, then you will be saved.

Faith. Yeah, it takes Faith

Ephesians 6:14-17 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

Truth, righteousness, readiness, faith, salvation, and the word of God.

Faith. Recently, Bill Nye and Ken Ham had a debate over creation/young earth verses science/big bang.

The responses are simply that Christians must be ignorant in order to believe what they believe. As an engineer, I have to challenge that statement. What Ken Ham brings up in his debate is that numerous Christians believe numerous different things. But the one thing they must do is put their faith in Christ. Salvation is based on their faith in Christ, not the age of the world.

This is perhaps the best statement that Ken Ham brought out during the debate. Bill made some very compelling arguments about the age of the earth, not the least of which is tree rings (no carbon dating required).

So how does this rock our faith? Well to be sure, it should knock our faith. The historical records of the Bible only indicate that the earth is 6000 years old. As a Christian I have two answers for this. I'm not sure if either makes a difference. The central point of Christianity is Christ.

When I boil it all down I find that if you don't read it for yourself and attempt to understand it for yourself, then you will not find God. If you seek Him, you will find Him.

So the idea that Christians are putting their heads in the sand on science can be equally turned to say atheists are putting their heads in the sand on spiritual matters. Of the two, I find spiritual matters to be infinitely more relevant. For if I'm wrong about the scientific age of the earth, I am nothing more than wrong. But if an atheist is wrong about who Jesus Christ is, then they are looking at something much worse than an F on a report card.

And of the two faith models (one that says this is all chance, vs one that says this is created), there is a lot more scientific evidence supporting intelligent design (creator).

Are you ready?

Ephesians 6:14-17 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

Truth, righteousness, readiness, faith, salvation, and the word of God.

Readiness. Instantly I go to 1 Peter 3:15 - to always be ready to give an answer for the hope that is in you.

This is something that I realize (as in right at this moment) I need to work on more. Not just me, but my family. Over the years you hear stories about people who make it a top priority in their day to tell someone about Jesus. And in our culture we look at those people like they are FREAKS! What's up with you?

I find myself in a mysterious place. I believe. There are many things that I still have questions about. But I believe. And I'm about to pour out my thoughts, but the conviction for me is can my family pour out thoughts like these?

SO, like yesterday, I can't shake the fact that this dude Jesus did what he did. He divided time! Today is February 14, 2014! That's 2014 years after he died. He is so radical that he divided history! The guy existed. There is no doubt.

What about what he claimed and what he said. Well, that's where we get CS Lewis' Trilemma that Jesus was either a Liar, a Lunatic or LORD, but he is not just some really nice guy that made some good points. Ghandi is a really nice guy that made good points. Marting Luther King Jr. is a really nice guy that made some good points. Tolstoy is a really nice guy that made some good points.

Jesus is different. No matter what you think of the gospels, you have to acknowledge that his ragtag twelve disciples that betray him at the cross became his voice in this world. From those dozen guys we have today's modern Christianity - a gospel (good news) of love (not war, like the way Islam spread).

Again, if you are reading this, I have to ask if you are being prompted by God to find Him. The Bible says that those who seek Him will find him.

Faith? Works? Righteousness? Is it all the same?

Ephesians 6:14-17 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

Truth, righteousness, readiness, faith, salvation, and the word of God.

Righteousness. What a big word. I often get hear this word and think "right doing." But it carries with it something that is spiritual - no matter what religion you are, it has moral implications in it.

In Christianity, we can gain righteousness through faith (and obedience) to God. And in this we are really looking to obey the one he sent, Jesus. I suppose this is important to point out because in the Old Testament, God used the Israelis to carry out his purpose. Their only requirement was to obey. The classic example is Gideon who took about 300 into battle against 135,000 Midianites.

And here is the important distinction, it took faith for Gideon to do what he did. His actions/faith was credited to him as righteousness.

When we talk about Jesus, we talk about putting our faith in him. And in doing so, we say we believe that His righteousness will cover our sins. His right standing with God will open the gates to heaven for us.

In response to this gift, we choose to live a life that demonstrates that faith and brings honor to Him. That means I will do works that support the teachings found in scriptures and I will chip away at those things in my life that are contrary to the things found in scripture.

Now, my personal reflection here is that it is not my job to make other people like me or like Christ. I believe that God calls, we answer. If you are reading this, I would question whether or not God is calling you. My experience tells me that people plants seeds in the hearts of others for years, and then one day, God makes those seeds sprout, and you discover a new life at work within you.

Personally, I don't care if you are atheist, agnostic, Buddhist, Islamic, gay, bi, straight, democrat, republican, independent, white, Indian, Asian, black, Hispanic, or undefined. I believe God is always ready to launch that new life in you. Don't be afraid of what you might find if you say "Yes" to God.

You gotta be honest

Ephesians 6:14-17 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

To be honest, I've not been looking forward to this passage of scripture. I've always found it too cliche. I even get grumpy when zealous Christians use these images in reality. Just like the "Hedge of Protection" So, I was avoiding these verses just because I didn't want to talk about old Roman armor.

But let me pull out the words that haven't changed... truth, righteousness, readiness, faith, salvation, and the word of God.

Truth. Curses, I can tell already that I'm going to have to linger on this verse for a few days. 

Truth comes out in so many places. I didn't realize it when I was doing it, but this is a cornerstone in my life. Not that I'm 100% truthful, but that I expect it of myself and I desire truth in people.

When I was first dating, my number one rule was "you gotta' be honest." This came from a Bill Cosby routine in which he says that the pain of childbirth pales compared to a guy who puts his arm around a girl for 2.5 hours in a movie theater. I thought as a kid "How stupid. Why doesn't the guy just tell the girl he is uncomfortable and move?" (I know you are thinking I'm pretty whacky - but seriously, you don't want some girl missing the rest of the movie wondering why you moved your arm, right? Just tell the TRUTH!).

And so through Bill Cosby, I began to understand the wisdom of Truth. It not only played out in my dating relationships, but in school - do you know how many teachers I worked with and just told them the truth. "Look, I got cut from the varsity team - I went out with my folks instead of doing homework. Can I get it to you Monday?" I brought it into marriage and parenting. There are two things that can get you a spanking in our house, violence (hitting, kicking) and telling lies. (No - my wife does not tell me lies all the time).

What about the work place? Do you know what a reputation of telling the truth can do for your career? It was interesting sitting around in meetings about hiring new employees and hearing the secular people in the room saying "We need more people with solid integrity like ..." and then they named off all the Christians in the company.

I've found very little tolerance in my self when I deal with people who don't come out with the truth. They've created a home front where little white lies are acceptable. Come on! Kids can tell what a lie is, but they don't have the discernment to tell when to use it. And for that matter, it is obvious the Adults aren't using the right discernment. You should only lie when you are hiding a special surprise! Not when you want to get out of going to an event or answering the phone.

So, I may sound like I'm on a high horse here, but I'm not. I struggle with this area as much as the next person. But I do try. 

"You gotta be honest."

The Stand.

Ephesians 6:13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

Time and time again, I find myself saying the later part of this verse ... after you have done everything, to stand.

What is that? What are we standing against? I'm thinking society and all it wants us to want.

When I open my eyes to what my brother is going through as a member of our armed services, I see places that are not 100% westernized. I see starving children next to piles of trash in mud hut cities. I see disease in faces and on skin. The overweight mothers and fathers lounging around near the huts, the disregard for property and people. I see things I wish I hadn't.

And then I see the rest... in the midst of the suffering, is a child playing with a stick, a ball, or a "doll." Children that are literally content to play with mud pies in the slums because they cannot even fathom the idea of a holiday by the sea.

Where am I going with all this? I can't help be feel the desire to be content with mud pies in the slums. That I might not be tempted by the holiday by the sea. We are the richest nation in the history of the world. I can't help but be convicted by the idea that I want to serve others rather than myself. I want to surrender it all to the one who gave it all for me. And yet over and over again I fall... and serve myself.

When will I be able to say "No!" to temptations? When will I be able to stand?

"The Stand"

You stood before creation Eternity in your hand You spoke the earth into motion My soul now to stand

You stood before my failure And carried the cross for my shame My sin weighed upon your shoulders My soul now to stand

So what could I say? And what could I do? But offer this heart, Oh God Completely to you

So I'll walk upon salvation Your spirit alive in me This life to declare your promise My soul now to stand

So what could I say? And what could I do? But offer this heart, Oh God Completely to you

I'll stand With arms high and heart abandoned In awe of the one who gave it all I'll stand My soul Lord to you surrendered All I am is yours

I'm not dead yet...

Ephesians 6:10-12 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood,but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

For years, I've turned over an idea in my head that I haven't been able to shake. The idea is that the spiritual world is probably more real than the physical world. Imagine being a fish in a fish tank - let's say a really cool fish tank like the ones at Rainforest Cafe! If you are hearty, you may see other fish come and go. As you talk to some fish, they will tell you that there is something bigger out there. But for the most part, your entire world is two tanks with a sky bridge.

Isn't that just what Satan would have us believe? That our world is not that significant and for sure, there is nothing more for us out there? Why bother telling others about the potential world beyond? 

I find myself struggling not against flesh and blood. There are very few people that I can't connect with in some way. But my real struggle is sharing Christ with people. I want to be an ambassador, but there are spiritual forces of evil at work to suppress my words and actions. This hurts me more than I can express.

In the end, the army of God will prevail. But the world we live in is still teaming with opposition. They are not dead yet. So I  have to ask, am I being a good steward of the gifts that God has given me? Am I even in the battle? 

In my time now, I desperately want to be on mission for Christ. I pray that I might boldly proclaim the gift of salvation to all who he has appointed. And I desire that my family would catch this same passion for Him.

Doing your own thing.

Ephesians 6:9 And masters, treat your slaves in the same way. Do not threaten them, since you know that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no favoritism with him.

OK - I'm a horrible guy. Remember the story of the soccer ball? Well, there was only one of the two balls in the bag. I found the other ball at home. I think I'm going to have to make that right.

Last time I said, you can't play favorites, you have to be consistent. You can't treat your favorite player one way (or your "good kid") and then treat your least favorite player another.

So - today, it is clear that I cannot live by a different standard than I expect of others. That includes my kids. Is it OK for me to take a cookie from the cookie jar and then yell at them if they take one? Of course! NOT! And that is the point. 

In our home, we work together and we play together. This is divinely inefficient. We could do so much more if we didn't overlap our time so much. But we find good fellowship in conversations around all our events. 

But the other thing is we develop consistency. Everybody is with each other and can see that we are getting the same opportunities. There is nobody in our house saying "That's not fair! HE got to have screen time! HE got to have Jell-o! HE got to sleep in!" No, everybody knows they are on the same playing field. 

That includes Mom & Dad. We try very hard not to use the words "BECAUSE I SAID SO!" because we are not exerting monarch authority over them. In emergency situations, we may say "NOT NOW! LET'S TALK LATER!!" In which case our kids know that we are pressed/stressed and they will give us the space we need to get back to an even keel.

Another place we do this is TV & Movies. Our house tries to play to the least common denominator. Meaning, we don't allow the 8 year old to see PG-13/TV14 shows. We attempt to limit the exposure of the rest of the kids as well. As parents, we limit our exposure. 

Consider the future conversation with your kids... "So - you guys saw Vampire Academy? Isn't that the one that says 'School Sucks!?' What's it about? Why did you see it? Can we see it?" Yeah... we just aren't going to go there.

I mean, you have to ask yourself if the culture today isn't what it used to be, and you like what it used to be a whole lot more, then why would you want to embrace this culture today? Sounds like the peer pressure of old.

So, are you consistent with yourself like you expect of others? 

Threats and Favoritism

Ephesians 6:9 And masters, treat your slaves in the same way. Do not threaten them, since you know that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no favoritism with him.

Is it just me, or do I have a tendency to instantly translate this to me and my children? Come on - tell the truth. There is something in this that I try very hard to apply to everybody - no matter who I am interacting with. It could be a co-worker, a boss, my wife, a child or a youth...

The bottom line is that I don't make any threat that I am not able to follow through on.

For instance, yesterday, the boys did a shooting drill and lost one of the game balls. I've lost about five game balls. But this time it is just unforgivable. We are in a totally fenced in area! Where could it have gone? So - if they couldn't locate the ball, we were going to run. And run we did.

How about closer to home? What about those children? If I say I'm going to take away something from them, I need to be able to follow through. So, I'm not going to take away screen time when I know they are going to be at a friend's house. And I won't use the birthday party as the threat because it not only punishes your kid, but also the person trying to celebrate a special day.

Instead, I delay that punishment until I have them under my jurisdiction. So - I can take away the screen time leading up to a slumber party and after the slumber party. Or I can make a financial dent in their pocket book. Or I can get some yard work done or house work done to "work off" the infraction.

So again, when building a team - whether at work, home, or on the play field, you have to be consistent. You can't treat your favorite player one way (or your "good kid") and then treat your least favorite player another.

Slavery in the modern era

Ephesians 6:5-8 Slaves, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ.  Obey them not only to win their favor when their eye is on you, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from your heart. Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people, because you know that the Lord will reward each one for whatever good they do, whether they are slave or free.

This kind of verse kind of knocks me in the head. The Bible is acknowledging that slavery exists and they are not condemning it. Further, in the Old Testament, it was OK for people to become 'salves' as they would 'sell' their land to get out of debt. But then in the Jewish tradition, there was the year of Jubilee where all debts were forgiven and people could reclaim their land.

Just the same, there it is... slavery. I do believe that we have moved beyond this among lawful citizens, however, I try to turn this into an application for myself. Romans 6 is all about letting go of your old self. It's about no longer being a slave to sin, but a slave to righteousness.

There is the target. I just want to be doing what is pleasing to God. Ephesians 6 says "because you know that the Lord will reward you..." But you know - honestly, I let go of rewards at some point in my life. I am content being saved from sins.

That turning point must have been an old pastor that said, "When I'm in line for the pearly gates I'm going to look forward and see those Taylor's who were so faithful and making such a difference for the Lord." At that, I began to wonder if this was good or bad as we are also told the first shall be last, and the last shall be first.

At that, I quit trying to figure out what God is all about and only focus on pleasing him.