Leave Your Mark

I burned the obituaries today. That is, when it is cold and we are going to be home, I will start a fire. Today, I happened to pull out the obituary section and without reading a single entry or glancing to see if any of the faces were familiar, I crumpled them up and tossed them into the fire.

Someday, I'm going to be that face on the page and that there is going to be some text under my photo. I had a brief fleeting moment of "what will my obituary say?"

The answer always comes back the same.

"I just want to be known for loving others well."

The first question I have is whether or not I love my family well. Next, it would be did I love Jesus well? (Wow that sounds heavy). But it is the truth.

There are two people inside me all the time. Paul in Romans 7 says "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do." - Yup... That's me.

Here's the thing. Most of us have an internal gauge of what right and wrong is. Helping someone is right. Kicking the dog is wrong. Sober people will admit that they seem to get this. But what about being selfish? It makes me happy, so it must be right. Right?

I believe in right and wrong and not a right and wrong that changes with time or culture. But since I can't seem to nail down these things (and honestly don't want to live by a list of right and wrongs) I choose a different path. I just want to love.

Galations 5 says it this way. "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law."

When I am tempted to kick the dog (and believe me, I am), I choose a different action. And that is what is always going on inside me.